I have read many parenting books. I am a classic pseudo-intellectual who is convinced all answers must lie in a book (or link) somewhere.
Turns out, as much as I love to read, there are no books with any of the answers to my Life that really matter. So, here is a list of the things that motherhood has taught me that I never found in a book.
1) These little people are supposed to break my heart a little. There is no scenario that is not at least a little bittersweet. My daughter stomping off to her room is both a rejection of my opinion and a healthy demonstration of independence. My son finally mastering some communication milestone makes me want to jump for joy, but also highlights how far he has to go before he catches up to his age group.
2) My children make me yearn daily to be a better person. I am all too aware that I am modeling everything - being a marriage partner, member of the community, professional, friend, sister, aunt. Everything I do takes on this second meaning of "what does this teach my children as they watch me". It is like living inside 1984 (without the rats...I hope).
3) That I am so glad I didn't know how hard this was going to be, because there is no way anyone could have convinced a younger, "so sure of the world" me of how happy this very difficult job makes me.
4) That every child needs a different set of parents. I laugh now at our hubris when our daughter was 2 and we thought "we got this! Let's have another!" What worked for our daughter hardly ever works for our son.
5) That I very much owe my mother thanks...and an apology.
So true! I laughed at #4. We were in the same situation. And our daughter has been nothing like her older brother from the day she was born. What a blessing that children aren't robots or that parenting isn't simple steps like following a recipe. I'm thankful for everything each unique child has taught me about the world, myself, and love. I'm also thankful for friends sharing their honest thoughts & feeling about life. That last one is for you, Lizzie.
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